We're not in Kansas anymore

Often I feel like Dorothy must have felt, often for similar reasons. The inhabitants of her new world were often culturally very different from, well, Kansas. That and the Wicked Witch, the flying monkeys, and the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Cowardly Lion, to name a few. Well, I have equivalents of them here.

Wicked Witch: very much the 189th and 1st Army. There are numerous rules put in place (many valid, some seemingly trivial and arguably parochial) whose intent appears to be nothing more than suppression of morale. This character is more an embodiment of the process here than anything else.

Flying Monkeys: just as the Wicked Witch is the 189th as a whole, the henchmen (Sergeants, Captains, etc) who deliver the edicts, FRAGOs, and other suppression tools are all the Flying Monkeys. I'm sure that when the flying monkeys from the movie were done with their raids, they went home to families and had a relatively normal life. Like this, I'm certain all those individuals are fine workers. However, together as one body, they bring nothing good.

Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion: well, I'll hold off on announcing these for now. (I have specific people in mind but as we shift out of our culture shock and get acclimated, some of these relationships are becoming less strained.)

To Dorothy, everything in the movie was just a little foreign. Here, many decisions and (apparent if not actual) justifications all seems rather odd and (to me) missing the point. Some examples:

• Today's class had an unstated prerequisite of having certified HMMWV drivers in the class (or at least available). Unfortunately this word never made it to us, so it didn't happen. Tomorrow's going to be a long (and hot) day. (It's not "possible" for anybody to drive one.) (Edit: they flexed and provided their own drivers, which in this case worked out better anyway.)
• Last night, our night shoot of the M4 carbine was (as we were told) intended to also give us an intro and familiarization to using NODs (night vision devices) along with our IR illuminators (lasers used for night shooting). As we get to the range, the NODs we were told would be available, were not. In fact, I learned afterwards that our unit had IR lasers and no NODs; and another unit had NODs and no lasers. (Sounds like JHMCS and AIM-9X ...)
• The dining facility we use for breakfast and dinner (we must not eat lunch there ... they'd rather pay for MREs): well, this facility is apparently so temporary that they have no facilities to handle cleaning dishes, so they don't. Every meal utilizes styrofoam plates, plastic silverware, and paper cups. I can only imagine how much trash we generate daily.
• Over the last week at the firing range, we (all PRTs) have had numerous "heat casualties" (dehydration and worse conditions that required some form of assistance by medical personnel). We're often in "heat condition 5", meaning all strenuous activities should be stopped ("moderate" activity should be limited to 20 minutes per hour). Should be. Right. Why not start weapons training earlier in the day (sunrise is ~6am) and get more time in the day. (Edit: they are now stopping training at 3pm; as you can see in the graph here, the heat index is already above 105 degrees, and that's not adding the 5-10 degrees that the (required) body armor adds.)
• And they have repeatedly tried to schedule us for night shoots at 10pm and later followed by "combatives" (similar to jiu jitsu and grappling) at 5am the next morning. Oh, and remember we should clean our weapons after a shoot.
• Nope, the Sane Man did not get the memo.

There are several other issues here. The lectures are often ill-prepared and/or ill-presented, with several instructors being downright unprofessional, though I must admit that the "combatives" instructors were awesome. Most of the guest instructors (different commands, flown in for our training only for a couple of days) were told we were another type of command (so they didn't tailor their discussion to the reconstruction role) and that they'd be speaking to about 1/3 to 1/2 of the people than what actually showed up (ergo not enough "products" or printouts available). This carries over immediately into room reservations: often no where near the available capacity. (When the schedule lists "ALL PRTs" with 13 teams here, and 6 positions listed per PRT, that's ... errr ... 6*13 = 78 people. In a room sized for 45 people. It don't work.)

In general, the training is frustratingly unorganized, reactive, and very difficult to just "swallow my pride and do it". They don't really know until the night prior the "solid" facts of what is happening the next day. Sure we have a rough daily schedule, but that's often just a point from which we can deviate. (I understand full well the requisite flexible of incomplete evolutions, etc. That doesn't appear to be the issue here.)

All in all, I'm learning. I'm not necessarily learning the method "forced" upon us, but I'm learning. I have not yet been beaten into using "check", "roger", "tracking", "too easy", or the dreaded "HUA". This will be an uphill battle for somebody. I fully fear that that "somebody" will be me.

Lastly, don't confuse the Wizard of Oz analogy with a literal overlay. Emerald City and the heel-clicking trip home aren't transferable. The closest thing we have is that they are systematically trying to make us look forward to getting to AFG so we can get out of the 1st Army's grip. It's working.

BTW: "HUAW" stands for "hurry up and wait". It's often mistakenly spelled "HUA". Trust me, it's more prevalent here than anywhere I've had before.